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VAMPIRE : My Life as a teenage vampire (Night Life), by Amy Mah
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Today's world is difficult for everyone, especially teenagers. They face the stresses of school, deciding whom to date, and the biggie of sex, just to name a few. Imagine all of those things ten times worse, and you might get an idea of what it's like being a living, breathing teenage vampire. At last, the world can read about the life of a girl with good teeth, her problems with strong sunlight that gave her spots, and the sunblock that made her hair go yucky and produced more spots. Yes, sunlight was dangerous, as she could be the first teenager in history to die from terminal acne! In her everyday life, older vampires expected her to walk about at night in the traditional female uniform, a see-through, 18th-century nightdress, without undies! Well, this female vampire knew why the cold winds blowing along the corridors were called, "male winds," so she wore her see-through nightdress over jeans and a very thick jumper. To be sure that people would still know she was a vampire, the jumper had a very large, pink bat on it. And as to guys, well, it was normal for a girl to dream about guys; she just wished the dreams could have involved chocolates and holding hands, not leaping out at someone, ripping off his shirt, and demanding to know what blood type he was (at least not on the first date).
This is not your typical vampire story where vampires are jumping in bed with humans or are entangled with werewolves for one reason or another. This is the story of a teenage vampire who is just trying to survive in her day to day existence. It is humorous and will make you laugh out loud when Amy is just being her own unique self.
She has a way with words that is like no other. Amy is so outrageous that you can't help fall in love with her. I'm sure she would have something to say about that... No matter! The book is a delight and if you are into the strange and unusual, you must get your copy and see for yourself. You better get a copy unless you want to hear from the author. She has her own version of bending you to her will. In all seriousness, get your copy, it is a great book.
- Sales Rank: #893047 in eBooks
- Published on: 2012-10-31
- Released on: 2012-10-31
- Format: Kindle eBook
About the Author
The Author Amelia Mah is a 20 something snarky, sarcastic and cynical author who has a very popular blog of how she sees the world from the point of view of a modern teenage vampire Following the success of her first book "FANGS RULE A girls guide to being a vampire" she had now expanded the idea of life as a teenage vampire into a full novel Amelia has given her avatar her own name so you can see the world first hand from a very bored teenage vampire that has been forced to remain a teenager for far too long She may have very good teeth and the ability to hang from ceilings but life is far from easy. Today's world is difficult for everyone, especially teenagers. They face the stresses of school, deciding whom to date, and the biggie of sex, just to name a few. Imagine all of those things ten times worse, and you might get an idea of what it's like being a living, breathing teenage vampire. At last, the world can read about the life of a girl with good teeth, her problems with strong sunlight that gave her spots, and the sunblock that made her hair go yucky and produced more spots. Yes, sunlight was dangerous, as she could be the first teenager in history to die from terminal acne! In her everyday life, older vampires expected her to walk about at night in the traditional female uniform, a see-through, 18th-century nightdress, without undies! Well, this female vampire knew why the cold winds blowing along the corridors were called, "male winds," so she wore her see-through nightdress over jeans and a very thick jumper. To be sure that people would still know she was a vampire, the jumper had a very large, pink bat on it. And as to guys, well, it was normal for a girl to dream about guys; she just wished the dreams could have involved chocolates and holding hands, not leaping out at someone, ripping off his shirt, and demanding to know what blood type he was (at least not on the first date).
Most helpful customer reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
Take a bite out of this book!
By Amazon Customer
I enjoyed this book a lot more after reading the guide to being a vampire that is also available. This is a really funny book. I think that girls would enjoy it more than boys because the main character is a girl.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Vampires With Bite And Edge
By Virgil Allen Moore
Amy Mah has one hell of a way with words. Her characters are sharp, well thought out, detailed, and extreme in their own ways. The author also isn't afraid to kill characters, something that I find a lot of other authors should think about. At any given point, you don't know who is going to live or die. It's like the walking dead with vampires instead of zombies! Read this well versed book now and enjoy the style, flare, and outright audacity of this amazing writer.
Virgil Allen Moore
Author of Demon Vampire
Demon Vampire (The Redgold Series)
[...]
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Genuinely fun tale of Undead Teens
By David
Okay I'll admit to not really being that much into anime. And this book very much fits into that genre. That initially interfered with my enjoyment, with the central character whining SO MUCH and the male vampires making Neanderthals look like Brad Pitt when it comes to gender politics. But...
After a few chapters the whole thing really grew on me. This makes for an original and entertaining "take" on vampires, as a distinct species who surround their lives with rules just to keep from killing each other (they are uber-predators). More, there's the intriguing idea of some vampires being able to recall their more ancient lives, at least to some degree. Plus the whole thing has a neat sense of humor behind it. Coupled with something I love in fantasies--a sense the world is beyond the page. Like (for example) HARRY POTTER, this book gives the strong emotional impression things have been going on long before the story begins and that lots of stuff happens where we don't see it. Not as easy or as common a think as it sounds!
True, a few characters (like the narrator's Aunt) remain total cyphers. Which is a shame. And the sense of time feels off here and there. But I'm well and truly looking forward to the next book in the series!
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